Chapter 15 There are times when you need an open sky Osho, I did everything or I had everything in this world that I ever wanted. I think I've exhausted my desire to achieve anything else. Even enlightenment seems to me a distant and impossible goal, beyond the realm of

Learn More, Not More It would be immodest to say that my Learn to Learn program is the most effective for most people, especially given the abundance of learning literature on the market. Each of these books

When a second child appears in the family, on the one hand, the burden on the parents doubles, but on the other hand, the mother has more experience, she has already gone through this. But for whom everything is the first time, it is for the firstborn. Accustomed to being the only one, the little person is not ready to share maternal and paternal love with someone else. Later he will understand how cool it is to be an older brother or sister, and now he is overwhelmed by the first adult feelings - jealousy, depression, stress. And here parents need to make efforts so that everyone shares the joy of the birth of a new family member.

It is important to know that a child under the age of seven does not distinguish between jealousy and aggression, at this age he feels like the center of the universe, who is used to receiving parental attention and care. At the age of seven and older, children become more aware, critical thinking develops, schoolchildren are better prepared to live together with younger brothers and sisters. But the smaller the age difference between children, the easier it is for the eldest to accept a second child. The best option is 2-3 years.

With a future brother or sister, you need to start even before his birth. In the process of preparing for the appearance of the baby, you need to include the older child. The firstborn can be interested by showing pictures of how the baby grows in the mother's stomach, emphasizing that newborns are helpless, clumsy and need support. Explain in a language that he understands that now there will be four of us, and from now on you will be an older brother / sister and be sure to tell us what are the advantages in this.

Show how it can be useful to the baby, play together, bathe. Praise your little helper: it's great that I have you, I couldn't have done it without you. Share with him pleasant moments, care, remember how small he was. This is a great opportunity to talk with your child about his childhood. After all, growing up is often associated with negativity, like parting with something good.

Growing up has its advantages, which the first-born can learn about. If you're older, then you can watch cartoons a little longer. Emphasize that this is a small child, and you are older: a baby cannot have sweets, but you can; we buy you beautiful bright school supplies, clothes, because you are studying, you need it more.

When drawing the future with four, remember that the pictures must be realistic. For example, when explaining to a girl that her brother will protect her, understand that decades will pass before he becomes a protector. The discrepancy between expectations and reality leads to conflicts and disappointments. Draw positive perspectives, but don't get carried away.

Parents have a complex that the child owes them something. Offer to help - yes, but you don’t need to force them to sit with the younger one. Don't turn your kids into babysitters. There should be no role reversal: there is an older brother / sister, and there are parents. If the first-born, for example, wants to shake the child, do not reject help, but be there at this moment. Due to his age, he cannot master everything, but curiosity plays. Therefore, everything that you cannot trust him, offer to do together. So you and both children will be supervised, and the elder will begin to develop a sense of responsibility and care for the other person.

Here's what mothers have to say about preparing an older child for the birth of a younger one.

"Daughter felt abandoned"

Yulia Salova, 28 years old, children - Nastya, 9 years old and Vova, 3.5 years old:

We started talking about the second child long before his appearance. Nastya wanted a sister, and I was waiting for the birth of my son. She convinced her that her brother, when he grew up, would ride in a car, he didn’t need dolls and dresses, so he wouldn’t have to share anything.

My daughter showed curiosity: how did the baby get into my tummy, was she the same. We went to the ultrasound together, she was fully involved in this process. Nastya got scared when I had to leave for the hospital, but I intrigued her that I would come with my brother.

When Vova appeared with us, it so happened that they began to pay less attention to her daughter, she had no one to go out with, she felt abandoned, went from corner to corner. And then she asked the question: "You don't need me anymore, do you love Vova?" And I realized that Nastya needs to be occupied. At the age of 6, my child already knew how to change diapers, spoon-feed, put to bed. Vova was the size of her baby doll, and the little girl was interested. But without jealousy and resentment, of course, can not do. Therefore, we sometimes arrange "Nastya's Day": one of the parents spends time with her while Vova is with another adult.

With the advent of the second child, the whole family changes. I began to relate to motherhood easier, more skillfully, and the first-born understands that he is no longer alone, not the center of the universe, selfishness does not flourish, but on the contrary, there is a feeling of caring for someone else.

"The son could stealthily pinch his sister"

Olga Golovan, 31 years old, children - Vanya 5.5 and Milana 3.8:

When I got pregnant, we told Vanyushka that his sister lives in his tummy, and soon you will meet, you will be friends. When the newborn was brought in, at first he avoided her, walked at a distance and looked at us incredulously. Then the son began to act up, tearfulness, nervousness were added - this is how he attracted attention to himself. And when Milana grew up a little, Vanya could pinch her on the sly.

Then we agreed with the whole family: if I spend time with the elder, dad or grandmother sits with Milan, and vice versa. The best thing is when the child is busy with something: drawing, puzzle, appliqué.

Now the children are friends, they miss each other. Vanya returns from kindergarten, hurries home, because his beloved Milanochka is waiting there - that's what he says. And the attention of their parents is no longer so important to them, they are fighting for toys, and for the same one. But it's like a game, because now they have more fun together.

This program is suitable for everyone, both men and women. With its help, you will not only lose weight, but also increase muscle mass, and this is very important when losing weight. You do not need special equipment, a visit to the gym, only your desire.

What is required for this program? First, the availability of free time. You will need 45-60 minutes to get started. Over time, increase the duration of classes to 200 minutes. The main thing is gradualness, do not rush. Another important point is sufficient water intake.

Proper nutrition is also important! Remember this. Here is the plan to follow.

Monday

• 25 seconds of sitting against the wall;
• 15 seconds plank;
• 5 push-ups;
• 35 jumps from the position of the legs together, arms lowered into position, legs apart, arms up;
• 25 twists in the prone position;
• 15 lunges;
• 10 times the swing of the press;
• 10 leg loops while running in place.

Tuesday

• 10 squats without lifting your feet;
• 10 jumps from the position of the legs together, hands lowered into position, legs apart, arms up;
• 10 pushups;
• 25 lunges;
• 35 times of swinging the press;
• 45 seconds of sitting against a wall;
• 30 second planks;
• 20 leg loops while running in place.

Wednesday

• 15 squats without lifting your feet;
• 30 times the swing of the press;
• 35 seconds of sitting against the wall;
• 50 jumps from the position of legs together, arms lowered into position, legs apart, arms up;
• 25 leg loops while running in place;
• 25 lunges;
• 40 second planks;
• 10 pushups.

Thursday

• 35 squats without lifting your feet;
• 20 twists in the prone position;
• 50 lunges;
• 30 second planks;
• 50 times press swing;
• 60 seconds of sitting against the wall;
• 35 lunges;
• 25 jumps from the position of legs together, arms lowered into position, legs apart, arms up;
• 20 pushups.

Friday

• 25 squats without lifting your feet;
• 40 times of swinging the press;
• 60 second planks;
• 30 twists in the prone position;
• 60 lunges;
• 55 jumps from the position of legs together, arms lowered into position, legs apart, arms up;
• 45 seconds of sitting against a wall;
• 50 leg loops while running in place;

And here is the cardio load plan for each day:

1. 30 seconds of fast running, 30 seconds of jogging (5 sets);
2. 35 seconds of fast running, 45 seconds of jogging (6 sets);
3. 45 seconds of fast running, 60 seconds of jogging (7 sets);
4. 50 seconds of fast running, 45 seconds of jogging (8 sets);
5. 55 seconds of fast running, 30 seconds of jogging (7 sets);
6. 60 seconds of fast running, 45 seconds of jogging (6 sets);
7. 65 seconds of fast running, 60 seconds of jogging (5 sets);
8. 70 seconds of fast running, 45 seconds of jogging (6 sets);
9. 75 seconds of fast running, 30 seconds of jogging (7 sets);
10. 80 seconds of fast running, 45 seconds of jogging (8 sets).